Grief.... we have ended a year (2014)….
and started a New Year (2015)....
Survival
Some
of us, who grieve the loss of a loved one, have just ended what could be the
two most difficult weeks of any year. Christmas and New Years create feelings
and emotions that surge to our inner most soul
and create a pain that few can
understand.
We
smiled and said we’re fine or O.K.; But we are not fine or O.K..
The norm
is to celebrate with friends, food, noise-makers and resolutions. As a griever,
you have successfully made it through these two weeks, while at times you just didn't want to go on.
Congratulations on your strength and
survival.
Fitting In
As all
around you, others seemed so happy, you may have thought
“what
do I have to be happy about? How can I possibly look forward to a new year
without the physical presence of my loved one”
Grieving hurts… and if your loss is recent (or even 10
years ago) it can be debilitating, devastating or even dangerous.
Your loved
one has died, your heart is broken, and your grief is overwhelming; you
struggle daily with the draining emotion of sadness, you don’t feel ready or hopeful
about facing a new year.
Am I Normal
You
are human, and all these feelings and emotions are what make you that way. Because
you are human, time will help you adapt and daily living can once again include
joy in these events….. as well as birthdays, anniversaries or similar special,
memorable happenings.
A Legacy of Gifts
Your love and relationship with your loved one influenced you physically, emotionally, spiritually and mentally. These are your
loved one’s permanent gifts to you. They can never be taken away or
forgotten.
But
you can share these gifts with others….. especially in the New Year.
My New Year Resolution
Write
a list of gifts your loved one has given you.
Maybe
a love for music, or reading, or art, or travel, or faith, or being physically active
…. (you get the idea). Match these gifts to your community needs where you
live. In memory of your loved one, volunteer your time to carry on and honor their
legacy….
Create a New Years Resolution to share these gifts with others.
Be it
with children, adults or seniors; find a place to put your loved ones gifts given
to you into action. Carry them forward by sharing them with others.
How do I create a Positive Resolution?
Helping
out at a children’s centre with crafts or sports; reading books to young
listeners at the library; joining a walking group or faith related study group.
You need to put the pieces of the puzzle together
and end up with a picture of how you will change your world (and the world for
others) over the next 12 months. Come Christmas or New Years 2015/16. you will
be better equipped to enjoy it… not forgetting your loved one, but
knowing the essence of "their being" still lives on through your actions and in
honor of them.
End Result
You
will feel stronger as you face your Christmas & New Year (2016) You may
even smile, remembering the love, joy and gifts your loved one
gave
to you still live on.
For Readers in Region of Waterloo Canada
Bill R is available for
Private Sessions
and/or referrals to Not-for-profit Organizations
providing no fee services to all denominations.
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